Riding a Moose
You know, I have a pretty exciting life, what with killing ninjas and all, but, thinking hypothetically, it would be really cool to ride a moose. I mean, meese (plural of moose, for all you uneducated beet bakers out there) are truly awesome animals. Very few animals have the ironing skill that meese have. If you've never seen a moose with an iron in action, you're missing out.
Well, anyway, if I was riding one, I'm sure I'd be confronted by some frontiersman, because, you know, that's what happens when you ride a moose. And he'd be all like, "Hey there, m'lady. Where are you headed?" because for some reason, he'd think I'm a lady, probably because out on the frontier, ladies are hard to come by, and all frontiersman are promoters of "wishful thinking," whatever that may be.
Anyway, then I'd be all like, "What? Do you dare insult my honor?"
And he'd be all like, "Anything for a lady," still entranced in his own little dream world.
I'd raise my hand, about to have the moose iron him to death, but I'd stop and rub my chin. "Anything, eh?"
Then I'd precede with getting him to fetch me plate after plate of ice cream. After about the tenth plate, my ears would be sore, and the moose would be bored, so the moose would probably kill us both with its ironing skills of doom.
So yeah. I'd die, but, you know, it'd be worth it. Just for the ice cream.
