Heart Problem Henry
Henry was walking along one day when his chest started to hurt. At first, it didn't seem too bad, but it got progressively worse as the day progressed. The next day, the pain had gotten so bad he went to the doctor.
The doctor did various tests on Henry. Some were pleasant, like eating a bunch of lasagna. Some were not so pleasant, like getting covered in peanut butter and attacked by a horde of hamsters.
After all the tests were over, the doctor came in to see Henry. "Well, Henry, I'm afraid we have some bad news. It appears that, somehow, you have a xylophone lodged in your heart. Now, I've never dealt with anything like this before, so I don't know how to treat it. However, my best guess as to how to make it better is to hit your chest with a sledgehammer as hard as I can."
Henry nodded. "Well, I guess it has to be done. Will I die?"
"Of course not!" said the doctor.
The doctor hit Henry in the chest with a sledgehammer. He died.
Henry found himself in a big huge room with signs all over the walls saying "Purgatory." People all around were doing random tasks, everything from counting sand to dancing with raccoons.
A man walked up to Henry. "You're Henry Figlertingstonwelderson?"
Henry nodded, looking dazed.
"Well, let's see...according to your records, you can get into heaven, but you have to serve 10 years here."
Henry scratched his head. "Well, what do I have to do?"
The man pointed to a Dance Dance Revolution arcade machine. "You have to play that."
Henry's eyes lit up. "DDR? I love DDR!"
After 10 hours, Henry hated DDR.
