Happy Wiggle Bunny
Happy Wiggle Bunny was a pink rabbit with a cute smile and funny little whiskers. She lived in the forest with her brothers and sisters for her childhood, brought up on only the best vegetables and foliage in the whole forest.
One day, Happy Wiggle Bunny was old enough to start her own burrow and go out and live on her own. She needed to get her career going and get a good amount of lettuce coming in. She first tried to be a clerk at a fast food store. That didn't work out so well, because she wasn't very good with the electronic cash register. Then she tried to be a customer service representative for Verizon DSL. She turned out to be good at the job, but she just didn't find her calling in the work.
For about a year, Happy Wiggle Bunny went from job to job, but never got comfortable. But she finally found her calling as a drug dealer, primarily heroine.
Every once in a while, someone wouldn't pay up and Happy Wiggle Bunny would have to break their legs. This, to her, was the most rewarding part of her work. She loved to hear the crunch and snap of bones breaking.
When Happy Wiggle Bunny died, she went to hell for her insanely sick deeds. However, she did make quite a profit continuing her career as a heroine dealer there too. And Happy Wiggle Bunny lived happily ever after, burning in hell for eternity.
