Hat Association of America
Morgan and I have started the "Hat Association of America". It runs as a totalitarian state. If you want to join our cause (which is that the word "hat" is cool), let me know, and I'll see if you are worthy enough to be let into this elite group... President: Jaxin Gardner, a.k.a. "The Blueberry Gatherer" Vice President: Morgan Petrovich, a.k.a. "The Tulip Frolicker" Secretary of Death and Piracy: Pablo Arias, a.k.a. "The Sharpened Fencepost" Director of Product Sales: Linn Jennings, a.k.a. "The Walrus Hugger" Secretary of Moneys (Treasurer): Emiko Nakamura, a.k.a. "The Birdie Hamster" Secretary of Robot Construction (Slave): Julian Gould, a.k.a. "The Frozen Monkey" Secretary of the Secretarial Section of Secretography: Xin Guan, a.k.a. "Tuza Tuzi" Secretary of the Newsletter: Larissa Simone, a.k.a. "The Riss-Monster"
List of Laws:
* It is illegal to carry an ice cream cone in your back pocket on Sundays.
* Biting someone with your natural teeth is considered "simple assault", while biting someone with your false teeth is considered "aggravated assault".
* Canned corn is not to be used as bait for fishing, but fresh or frozen corn is permittable.
* Detonating a nuclear device is grounds for a $500 fine.
List of Members:
Jaxin Gardner
Morgan Petrovich
Pablo Arias
Linn Jennings
Emiko Nakamura
Julian Gould
Xin Guan
Nikki Lagerquist
Larissa Simone
